Sunday, January 27, 2013

One More Thing


I’ve been having trouble keeping up with the blog lately –  coming up with ideas, writing new posts, and making the rounds commenting at so many of the blogs I like to visit. Blogging is important to me, and I enjoy it, but it’s one more thing, ya know? We all have tons to do: parenting, working, cooking, cleaning, writing, care giving, the list goes on and on. In the larger scheme of things when looking to scale back, blogging seems like the one area I could possibly do that. And I've thought about it.


Then at church this morning, the message was on building bridges. I’ll admit, I am a bridge burner. I often don't value the relationships in my life enough until I've let them go. If you burn enough bridges, our pastor reminded us today,  you end up on an island - alone. Which takes me back to my very first blog post. I’ve done a lot of island living over the years. When life gets big and overwhelming, it’s easy to revert to our old ways. For me, that includes isolating myself.

So today’s blog post is me fighting against my old nature. And instead of letting the blog stagnate, I'm continuing to build bridges, make connections, make friends. That has been the very best part of blogging, for me, after all. 

And one more thing. . .


62 comments:

  1. Totally know what you mean. I suppose it's about taking one thing at a time, building and connecting with one bridge at a time, too. You're right, Ruth, making & keeping friends has been the best part of blogging for me as well!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sometimes it seems so do-able. But others it just seems like I'll never catch up. Oh well. I'll just keep plugging away.

      Delete
  2. These days I spend one day a week cooking. I make up 'ready meals' that I can freeze and defrost as needed. I gained about an hour a night that I can use for doing what I want to do. (It also allows me to take advantage of bulk-buy offers so it keeps prices down.)

    And you will not go to your deathbed wishing you'd kept a cleaner house. But you WILL go wishing you'd had more time to enjoy yourself. And that includes keeping in touch with blog pals! Prioritise yourself a little. You can't care for others if you don't care for yourself!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, I definitely need to get more organized about meals. I have a panic attack on a daily basis when dinner time comes around and I have no idea what to make ;)

      Delete
  3. It could be easy to cut out anything that is social for those things we "need" to do, but really as humans we have a need for social intereaction (each at our own level) and for relaxation. Blogging is filling a need that will help you function in other areas. Build that bridge.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I started my Monday Mishmash because it was an easy post for me to do each week. Plus, my followers seem to really like the opportunity to share whatever is on their mind. Maybe coming up with a set topic for one day each week would help you, too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for the suggestion, Kelly. Actually, I only blog one day a week. But still. . .

      Delete
  5. Ruth I am also VERY prone to island living. I favor anonymity and alone time. But I so agree with what you're saying about connections. I am so glad I've made them and we might never know which ones are important for us or more important for the person we are connecting with. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for turning that around and helping me to look at that from another perspective, Coleen. So true!

      Delete
  6. Man do I hear ya! The one more thing is everything. I had to really sit myself down and realize that I just don't have enough time to do EVERYTHING. So I have had to limit my time in many aspects of my world. With regard to my blog and blogs in general I have limited that to Mondays. I blog every Monday no matter what. Then after I get that dealt with, I visit blogs. Mondays only. The rest of the week is for writing and researching. That's it. Otherwise I find I am spending all my time being social (yes, I understand we need this) and not getting my actual work done. Good luck with these bridges.

    ctny

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sounds like you've found a good balance, Courtney. Thanks for the well wishes ;)

      Delete
  7. I can identify with a lot of what you are writing here, Ruth, but I do believe half of the fun of blogging is checking in with the various virtual friends and seeing what they are up to every now and then.

    Have a good day!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is definitely half the fun, Karen! But I can lose hours doing it!

      Delete
  8. It is hard to keep up, so I allow myself periodic breaks from blogging (even though I love it!). Sometimes it's a week. I don't write on my blog or comment on anyone else's. Breaks are good and needed, I think.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, Barbara. I allow myself little breaks as well. The trick is not letting the little breaks turn into indefinite breaks ;)

      Delete
  9. Keeping this up is a major feat, so taking breaks is really important, Ruth. As to bridges between friends or acquaintances, they take a lot of time to maintain. I hate losing touch with people, but distance and changes in our lives often make it impossible to stay close.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, Lee. I'm learning the importance of breaks.

      Delete
  10. The "one more thing" thing kept me from blogging for a long time, and still keeps me from, well, other *things* :0

    I remind myself that what I do should be rewarding. This helps navigate all the "things" vying for attention.
    Oh, and another thing- I’m always happy to see another Ruth Post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much for your encouragement Mirka. I do find blogging rewarding and I'll do my best to keep up with it.

      Delete
  11. Holy Moly, Ruth. Please tell your pastor his sermon reached all the way to the Pacific Northwest. I, too, am a bridge-burner, though I would not have had the courage to admit that if not for this post. My posts are very controlled and planned, due in part to not wanting to truly connect...out of fear of opening up. However, you and a handful of warm-hearted bloggers have encouraged me to step across a bridge - at least halfway - and form a friendship. Thanks, dear friend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for these lovely words, Victoria. I knew we were kindred spirits! ;) And I'm so thankful for your friendship.

      Delete
  12. Ruth, I'm burned out. I realized this while my computer was out for over two weeks. Plus the three week break I took at Christmas. It was nice too. I miss folks like you though. You have a heart for writing and for living. I love your posts. I read them when you don't even know I'm lurking. Sometimes I don't have the time to comment. Or anything brilliant to say. But the bridge must be kept for the few friendships I treasure. Like yours. I am down to one day a week. And maybe less as I revise my MG and try to do 12 x 12. Plus I am signing up for writers dojo. I feel I need these things more than blogging several times a week. *deep sigh* I feel I make it more complicated than it should be. You know?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Robyn, I'm sorry to hear you're burned out. I can't even imagine blogging several times a week. You are right to adjust your schedule and make time for your novel and nurturing your writing pursuits. I hope you find refreshment in your new schedule.

      Delete
  13. I love how you put it, Ruth. Maybe that's why I was fine with cutting back blogging to two days a week, but I'm not interested in stopping completely. I would miss it too much, and there are many advantages to blogging.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There are many advantages and it can easily consume a lot of time and energy. Cutting back sounds like it was a good call for you.

      Delete
  14. I feel the same way! But, I will carry on. And I'm glad you are, too!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Ruth! Thanks for visiting my blog today! I think most of us who have children here would understand that moms (and dads) who write often have a lot on their plate outside their blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Cynthia. Thanks for stopping by and chiming in.

      Delete
  16. Glad you're sticking with it! I've scaled back on blogging a lot, which you can do and still stay connected. Gone are the days when I blogged several times a week. Once a week is good now :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good point, Alexia. I guess I don't need to think in extremes - stopping altogether. There is always the option of scaling back.

      Delete
  17. You're so great, Ruth. Love your openness here... We've got to keep a good balance, and that's different for all of us--I think it's definitely about knowing ourselves and pushing ourselves, but keeping our priorities in the right place too. I know I'm trying to master this!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much for your support, Morgan. You are always so encouraging. Love that about you =)

      Delete
  18. I'm the worst at keeping a consistent blog but I like it because sometimes I do have time to blog and 'chat' with my readers so I decided to keep it. Love Newsboys! They're one of my favorite groups. Also, you won something on my blog!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oooooo, I won, I won. Yay!
      And thank you ;)

      Delete
  19. I often get caught in the same trap with blogging and life. I aim for once a week on the blog and have started to include more guest posts. And I've also allowed myself to relax again about blogging. I started my blog for fun, so I try to keep it low pressure. I don't need to write the Great American Blog...just something simple.

    As for living on a island. I've been very overwhelmed lately with all that I have to do. I've noticed myself pulling away from friends and family, and mostly feeling annoyed about all the drama when I do hang out with them. I think I'll have to try and put the fun back in socializing again. Keep the same mantra as I have with the blog: make it fun and low stress.

    Thanks, Ruth, for being honest and helping me sees things anew.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for sharing this, Katie. I guess it's something a lot of us go through. The important thing is to realize what's happening and make a conscious decision to do something about it before we lose those relationships for good. I wish you all the best with doing away with the drama and maximizing the fun!

      Delete
  20. I go through phases too. Sometimes it's all I can do to put up a post each week never mind visit other blogs. Other times I can't get enough of it. There are enough of us in the circuit to allow for individual lapses I think and we all understand because life can get tough/rough/busy sometimes for all of us.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like how you put it, Rosalind. I guess we all struggle with this, so are understanding of each other's lapses. Thanks for reminding me of this.

      Delete
  21. I miss my bloggy friends when I don't have time to visit so often - they are as important as my real-life friends. I also find I can be more myself on my blog because no one has any expectations of me, whereas my kids, boss, friends do.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I feel the same way, Annalisa. I value my bloggy friends as much as my in-person ones!

      Delete
  22. I think a lot of people burn bridges without even realising they're doing it! It's great that you've become aware of your habit of doing this.

    I think most bloggers have known that 'stagnated' stage, where they aren't inspired to blog at all. I know I have. But hopefully they all push through it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's good to know that I'm not alone in this way of thinking. And like you said, we'll push through it.

      Delete
  23. What a great post! I loved the picture of the bridge and your words. Life is busy and it can be hard to strike a good balance. Looking forward to more of your blog posts. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for the encouragement, Stephanie! =)

      Delete
  24. Boy, do I know where you are coming from. There are times when I wish I could turn the clock back two years before I launched my blog when I only focused on writing. But, I was encouraged to start buildng my platform.... you get the picture. I've limited my posted and am back meditating daily with a large group of like-minded friends. Crave that balance. Then I realize, that my blog has become a resource and service. So I keep moving forward.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm glad that you have regained that balance that is right for you, Patricia! And you're right, your blog has become a wonderful resource for so many. Glad you are sticking with it.

      Delete
  25. I know exactly what you mean. I love blogging for many reasons, but mostly because of the people I've met and the resulting relationships. In the past year or two though, it has become that "one more thing", and I'm challenged with keeping up AND actually getting time to write. It's a tricky balance, I'm thinking, and I am prayerfully figuring it all out. I did go down to posting mostly once a week, which I hate to do, but it has helped a bunch. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I've many friends who share the same sentiment and are working through it as well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can't even imagine blogging more than once a week. I'm glad that cutting back is working out for you. Same as you, I would miss the relationships if I gave it up.

      Delete
  26. I totally understand... I've cut back on blogging, but still do it when I have time. I want it to remain fun and not a chore:)

    ReplyDelete
  27. Some weeks it feels so hard to keep up with my blog and followers, but I do think it's worth it. I've thought about scaling back, and sometimes I do with occasional breaks or blogging twice a week instead of three times.

    ReplyDelete
  28. I plead guilty to have just been on a blog suspension. I was working on a revision with a deadline and I had to let something go. It's nice to be back in the saddle.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I imagine it took courage to say that your usual approach when you experience intensity is to withdraw -- I think it's mine as well. For me, just telling other people I know that I am feeling the urge to withdraw helps me to let go of the need to do it, because it helps me to see that I am in fact surrounded by people who I can be honest with and don't have to hide from.

    ReplyDelete
  30. No more island living! Put yourself out there - you'll be amazed at what you find.
    I don't like blogging much either, and was having a lot of trouble coming up with things to write about, but Viklit's Celebrate the Small Things blog-hop really helped. I believe in appreciating small things and being grateful for what you have, so once a week I have no trouble coming up with something. This might be a good group for you. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  31. Hurray for building bridges. : ) Blogging is wonderful and a great way to make connections, but I agree that it can also be that "one more thing." It's hard to do everything, especially when life serves up other things that can't be put off. I think being honest and doing the best you can is the best that anyone can ask for.

    ReplyDelete
  32. So get the bridge burning thing - though some bridges need to be burnt but wisdom shows us where to build or restore.
    I love Newsboys
    xx

    ReplyDelete
  33. Hi Ruth -

    If you've been posting on a heavy blogging schedule, I can see where you'd suffer from burnout. I was at that point, so I cut back from 3 times per week to 2 times per week. It's made a huge difference.

    I also cut back on a weekly email update. It's now a monthly update. My stress level has dipped as a result.

    Blessings,
    Susan :)

    ReplyDelete
  34. Glad you can still keep up with all of lifes hectic rounds

    ReplyDelete
  35. I know exactly what you mean!

    But I decided that I've invested too much in the blog and in the relationships that come from it -- they're the biggest thing! -- to let all that fall by the wayside. Connecting in ways that we can is a part of the writer's life today. If we didn't do it by blogging, we'd have to do it some way. '

    I don't post more than once a week, though. It's all I can handle.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Ruth, I just celebrated my third blogiversary last week. From the beginning I set a weekly blogging schedule. I knew any more than that would be too much and I would burn out. So far it's working for me. Maybe you could try a twice a month, or even once a month, schedule. "Balance" is my constant goal in life, and I'm sure it will remain a struggle! :-) Wishing you all the best in all you do!

    ReplyDelete
  37. What an awesome post! A great reminder for all of us. Sometimes we don't realize we have burned a bridge until it is too late.

    ReplyDelete